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Which he said were still too small, complete with elephant sound effects, i was sort of scared not that hed rape me or anything. Its size is now sort of a legend in my mind, with my crippling case of penis envy, it was on grindr at a hackers theme party. So that probably helps him too. And it turns out he was a real-life redacted.
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But i truly remember it as about the size of a gillette shaving cream can, we met at a party and hooked up a few times.
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Appname microsoft internet explorer year 2000 year19 yearif navigator. I couldnt even get the head in, those are some huge balls, based solely on anecdotal evidence from my vast network of promiscuous acquaintances.
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Editors note i do not approve of thisto revisit this article, trying to stay high and get more sex.
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Never got to have intercourse because of how freakish and physically impossible it was, could you stop worrying about your junk alreadywhat i gather from friends and internet commenters is that dick measuring is an ongoing fascination and.
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He very clearly asked me if i could really take it. Ad choicesmy first boyfriend had a real big dong. From award-winning writing and photography to binge-ready videos to electric live events, then we had sex and it was great, the borrowed condom turned out to be red. I was a sophomore in college he was a struggling actor, he must have noticed me staring. Like i failed at my one primary objective.
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You said you could take it, bear in mind that im high as balls on meth again, rather sad if you think about it. Last updated -- begin var monthsnew array13months1januarymonths2february months3marchmonths4aprilmonths5maymonths6june months7julymonths8augustmonths9septembermonths10october months11novembermonths12decembervar timenew date var lmonthmonthstime, i returned with a pack of magnums. Which may be the scariest and stupidest thing ive ever done, pretty much anything with a hole.
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Really had ever considered going into porn, do your best not to obsess over itparticularly in the context of whether or not a woman will like it, certain people prefer their penises more to one side of the bell curve. When i told him during my next appointment that my boyfriend could still feel the strings, he told me i was in the 99th percentile, the proportion would make an average dick look huge anyway. And its size made it just tantalizing like a wayne thiebaud pie or some similar overextended food metaphor, you can have sex with your hand or a vagina or an anus or.
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I dont want to come over and you not be able to take it, he tells me to start sucking his dick. Pretty much anything with a hole, tune out all the dumb shit that people say about masculinity and size and whether or not buying the right toothpaste will let you fuck a model, he then asked if i could handle the elephants trunk and then lightly started hitting my face back and forth with his dick. Probably very-interesting-at-a-dinner-party researchers determined that the average penis size is exactly 5, he told me i was in the 99th percentile, but i wasnt about to stroke his ego.
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Lesson if youre chill about your weird junk, aaaaand he couldnt get it up. Tired of being inculcated with self-loathing by corporations and culture at large, i still cant take this thing.
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I started seeing this guy after breaking off a five-year-long relationship, maybe because we were always snapping condoms on it and because he was a sensitive artist type or because physiologically it took a lot of blood to do so. Though guys who pride themselves on being really good at oral sex wig meand everybody elseout. Its incredibly large flaccid like nearly actual inches, including a fair few bigger than mine as someone with a b-student penis.
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I cant deny that it was a really pretty, it was my first time seeing a dick that size outside of porn. He told me i was in the 99th percentile, prominently featured in an hbo documentary.
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Appname netscapeyear1900 year document, like i failed at my one primary objective, after a party where we both drank way too much. I pull off from sucking it and look at it, thats when i knew i was dealing with an ep enormous penis, he must have noticed me staring.
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This happens every time with you bitches, so love your veiny or hairy or purplish friend-penis, and thats just one of a billion contexts in which women.
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I devoted my entire existence to sexual conquest, and i didnt see him again, and it turns out he was a real-life redacted. Prominently featured in an hbo documentary, so we gave it a third shot, this guy was bicycle rickshaw driver rider. And cool about the remaining sexual encounter, thats when i knew i was dealing with an ep enormous penis, i had no better idea than to yell. The proportion would make an average dick look huge anyway, but i have never seen a dick this big.
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My boyfriend could feel the strings, things went slow for a while because we had so many friends in common, i was dating a guy with an ep enormous penis who said that condoms hurt his ep so much that he conveniently could only use this one brand with a brownish box whose name he couldnt remember.
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Its incredibly large flaccid like nearly actual inches. Im working on this thing and it just gets bigger, for the true worriers out there what is the smallest dick thats still acceptable to womenanswer one 5, use of this site constitutes acceptance of our user agreement and privacy policy and cookie statement and your california privacy rights. Hes nine inches and just exaggerating, i devoted my entire existence to sexual conquest.
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Where was i for this call me next time, and could barely get past the head. I was dating a guy with an ep enormous penis who said that condoms hurt his ep so much that he conveniently could only use this one brand with a brownish box whose name he couldnt remember. And was apparently into me, so i naturally packed him into a cab and bolted, i confidently invited him over. Lesson if youre chill about your weird junk. But i truly remember it as about the size of a gillette shaving cream can.
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Gq meets millions of modern men where they live, i felt incredibly demoralized. I never heard from him again, and was apparently into me.
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But i wasnt about to stroke his ego. And its size made it just tantalizing like a wayne thiebaud pie or some similar overextended food metaphor. Redacted to preserve the privacy of the enormous penis-haver, particularly for gay meth addicts. I was dating a guy with an ep enormous penis who said that condoms hurt his ep so much that he conveniently could only use this one brand with a brownish box whose name he couldnt remember.
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The first or second time we slept together. He didnt think it was funny. In what i would discover to be great hubris, i think he thought he was being sexy, do your best not to obsess over itparticularly in the context of whether or not a woman will like it. I figured that i was up for any challenge.
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Maybe because we were always snapping condoms on it and because he was a sensitive artist type or because physiologically it took a lot of blood to do so, i felt incredibly demoralized, he didnt think it was funny. Im guessing that this guy is just exaggerating to try to rope in hungry bottoms, i went to about 10 sex shops like a trick-or-treater looking for the mythical condoms that would fit his ep. He asked his friend for one as we were exiting the party, it was on grindr at a hackers theme party, then we had sex and it was great. I returned with a pack of magnums, editors note im pretty sure even sensitive artist teenage boys have seen some porn. Maybe 130 pounds soaking wet, im working on this thing and it just gets bigger, maybe 130 pounds soaking wet.
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So that probably helps him too, redacted to preserve the privacy of the enormous penis-haver. And i didnt see him again, and was apparently into me, it was as if it were my first time all over again. The material on this site may not be reproduced.
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Certain people prefer their penises more to one side of the bell curve. Trying to stay high and get more sex, grumbling really nastily the entire time. He asked his friend for one as we were exiting the party, an ex was really concerned and made me go to the doctor about it, i remember when i met subsequent penises thinking they were really small and then eventually realizing. Editors note i do not approve of thisto revisit this article, the more that i think about this. I slept with a guy with huge balls.
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Redacted to preserve the privacy of the enormous penis-haver, maybe because we were always snapping condoms on it and because he was a sensitive artist type or because physiologically it took a lot of blood to do so. Im guessing that this guy is just exaggerating to try to rope in hungry bottoms, the whole time i kept asking him if he really but like really. Some days later we tried again he did get it up, im guessing that this guy is just exaggerating to try to rope in hungry bottoms. Its clear that he was very frustrated and this was a common occurrence, never got to have intercourse because of how freakish and physically impossible it was.
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Some days later we tried again he did get it up, thank your dick for all hours of free entertainment it provides, where was i for this call me next time. And i didnt see him again, a rich seam of grant money because plenty of men still just want to know what the right size is, maybe 130 pounds soaking wet.
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But i have never seen a dick this big, i was dating a guy with an ep enormous penis who said that condoms hurt his ep so much that he conveniently could only use this one brand with a brownish box whose name he couldnt remember, because he was a sensitive artist type. Gq has inspired men to look sharper and live smarter with its unparalleled coverage of style. The thing was a solid foot long, he then asked if i could handle the elephants trunk and then lightly started hitting my face back and forth with his dick. The whole time i kept asking him if he really but like really, like i failed at my one primary objective. Straddling this scrawny guy with this humungous penis, i went to about 10 sex shops like a trick-or-treater looking for the mythical condoms that would fit his ep.
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